Archive for December 2013

Forget the five stages of grief

When I was a graduate student, I learned that Kubler-Ross’s five stages of grief have been oversimplified and misunderstood over the years, and that many researchers and clinicians no longer consider the model to be the gold standard in terms of understanding how we deal with death. For one thing, the original research was based on…

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The notion of “the bad mother”

This is a good reminder of how unhelpful — even damaging — negative self-talk around parenting can be. I like how the author began considering her parenting decisions/reactions as skillful or unskillful, rather than good or bad. “Unskillful” at least leaves room for improvement, while “bad” leads to feelings of guilt, hopelessness and frustration.  The good…

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Grieving during the holidays

The stretch from Thanksgiving through the New Year can bring up a lot of complex emotions, especially if a loved one has recently died. As promised, here are some ideas for managing the holiday season if you’re grieving: 1. Adjust your expectations. Don’t attempt to take on your usual slate of holiday duties. Scale back.…

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